stupid knitting patterns

I'm working on a great charity project over on the Buffettnews.com/forum site. It's a beach/JB themed throw done in dishcloth squares of 10". I am no pattern maker, but there are any number of cute patterns out there. However, the people who write the patterns are idiots. I think there's a serious need for a quick and easy PDF entitled "dishcloth patterns for people who think" as opposed to the subtitle that must be on every dishcloth pattern I find which is "patterns for dummies" If you can't sort out the instruction to make a 5 row seed stitch border and keep 4 stitches on each edge in the border stitch, then you are a moron. I do not like to see K1, P1, K1, P1 actually printed on each line of a stinking pattern. Better yet, put the effer in a graph and be done with it. All these letters make my head swim.

off to take the eldest to become BRACES-FREE!!! Hopefully I will edit the latest pattern to the point that it no longer makes me fume when I look at it.